Burning Buns of Fire

I have never wanted to spank Anonybabe as badly as I wanted to spank her last night. It would have been incredibly satisfying to smack her little behind hard. I only speak the ugly truth.

She spent the early evening throwing things at me after I asked, then told, then harshly told her not to. This is not something she's usually wont to do; she casually tossed my shoe to me when I walked in the door "Mama? You want your shoooe?" and after I asked her not to do that she spent the rest of the night observing the effects of launching this or that item in my direction (a ball, a food-covered fork).

And then we had an awful bedtime. Much of it our fault, she'd slept in with Anonyhub and didn't take a nap, and then we didn't get her to bed early so that she was incredibly slap happy by the time we turned out the lights and told her it was quiet time. She babbled and sang at the top of her lungs, stood up and crashed down in her bed, kicked and squirmed. None of this would be an issue if we didn't share a bedroom. But I was also going to bed early because I was nursing a cold. Plus Anonybabe has pulled this sort of stunt in daycare, when she's in a room of 2 year olds trying to take a nap. The girl does need to learn to be quiet when we ask her to be quiet. She feeds on the attention she gets from being loud when she's supposed to shush up and it's fucking obnoxious. She attention-mongered for something like half an hour, pushing my buttons, pushing Anonyhubs, giggling nervously and giddily when we would snap harshly at her to be quiet. I longed to slap her behind repeatedly, vengefully. Thankfully, Anonyhub saw how unhinged I was getting and he kept me at bay.

The only time she would be remotely quiet was when we were in her face. Anonyhub finally picked her up and pinned her arms and legs and rocked and shushed her to sleep.

Sigh. Did she run the show last night? Yeah, she did. Would a spanking have been in order? Possibly. I'm saving that for my nuclear option. It may be that they would work beautifully with Anonybabe and I'm doing us both a disservice by not spanking her. It's a little arbitrary to withhold it when I've pinched and yanked her in the past. But I don't know that spanking is such a good idea for me either. I had weird spanking experiences as a child and so the act is a little bit tainted for me. Plus they didn't work on me, so I'm a little bit biased. But I don't think physical pain is such a horrible thing to inflict on a kid, it's the psychological jabs you throw that are the problem. And those can happen with or without the application of palm to behind. I don't think they are such a big deal.

We'll see. I get the impression discipline is a custom-made ride for each parent and child, so I don't feel so bad that I'm flying blind, here.