Nutty Professor

I took a pregnancy test the other day for a couple of reasons, even though near celibacy, an IUD, and continuing breastfeeding mean I was being more than a little paranoid:



1. A friend of mine just got accidentally pregnant with her 3rd child. Her womb wasn't quite as safeguarded as mine, and she and her husband are definitely more randy, but it still freaked my shit out.


2. Due to the IUD and breastfeeding, I still don't really have periods, so how would I know? And if I were to get pregnant with an IUD, things would get ugly fast. As unlikely as it was, I wanted to make sure.


3. I went through a week of eating voraciously. Eating sugar and dairy voraciously. Lots of fruit juices, and lots and lots of milk...this also hasn't happened since I was with child.


4. I have been incredibly, incredibly spacey lately. As forgetful as I was during pregnancy, when I lost my keys a grand total of four times. (To be fair, I think my burgeoning belly and my maternity coat with its shallow pockets had something to do with that). Forgetting to take letters my husband asked me to drop off at the post office 10 minutes after he reminded me to take them. Forgetting to take the necessary pump parts to work and then driving to Target to buy more, only to realize that I've forgotten my wallet at home as well. And then today's coup de grace: taking our one and only car to work when I was supposed to take the train. This is after our household has been living, eating, and breathing a project that Anonyhub has been working on non-stop for a final class he has at the botanical gardens tonight. A class that he has to have the car to get to. I'll have to leave early today to get the car back down to him so he can then drive back up past where I work to get to said class in the north suburbs.


Yipe. I'm glad I'm not preggers but I'm a little frightened here.

Not that I haven't always been a little, shall we say, somewhere else. I remember, as a child, reading about that ancient Greek who was so preoccupied with his thoughts and/or mathematical theorems that he walked right off of the road into a ditch. And I remember thinking, woah. I hope that's my excuse. That I'm really really smart.

Alas, no. Mother nature doesn't always see fit to balance out her not-so-observant children with big brains to think with when they aren't paying attention to the present. She has, however, blessed me with more than my fair share of luck. So I can't complain.

Perhaps I just need a nap.